As Closed Off As I am...

My lil gal and I made a video. It will be enjoyed by... yourselves. You will love this, and you will fall to your knees in exaltations.

And fervored whatchamacallits. She baked a cake last night, I filmed her beaming over it earlier today. She is not only my one and only, she is the best friend I have in the world. Even as closed off as I am.................................

Am I all alone here? If you are out there and are reading, shout yourself out. I am lonely. Make yourselves heard...

Shambles...

I've seen alot of shit. Haunting indeed.
Fucking indeed.
Oh yeah, ask me about it. Oh, I'm sorry, too involved in yourself?
Same here. Movie reviews: They all pale in comparison. To what?
Exactly.
Pale...
Wanton...
Thrillfull...
They had no idea what they set loose upon the world.
All (s)he wants is...
MORE.
"We shall return soon."
Full force.

Meat/beat/manifesto of Death.

Babble. You don't know how to ease my pain, you don't know. You don't know the sound of my tears falling. You don't know. You just don't fucking know. Bend to my will. Give in. I won't accept anything less. But you won't give me what I want. I will survive. I will be less than I am now, but I will. I will. Meatamorphisize!!!
I am a cannibal, I will yet eat myself. I know I'm weird, but if you would judt read.. in between...
the...

A Public GRAVEH Announcement!!!

It may yet save your life if you heed my visions of false party-gawdness and pollo loco-motion.

Now to answer questions: No, it was powdered sugar. I ain't got that kinda money, but if I did, it wouldn't be going up my nostrils.

Drugs are bad, peoples, mmm'kay?

I think maybe later we are gonna see National Treasure 2, just me and the rugrat, and I think her lil friend. No, not that lil friend(her imaginary Mitch Conners hand), but one that actually lives and breathes, go figure!!! As long as they keep the chatter down a bit, I'm good.

Enjoy the video; learn a lesson or two, maybe...

Barrel Bottom Scrapings...

I added a Youtube player at the top there, so you can enjoy even more of me.
I know you will love this, as now there is more of me to love. It is like being borne on the wings of angels, their wing feathers kissing you ever so gently.
"Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm........."
We saw Beowulf 2, did I mention? Good too, once again. I also put up some Christmas lights and will get the roof done tomorrow, if I don't have a stroke from all the anger involved in accomplishing this feat. I will probably have to do some inside the house tree-work too, which means I will be covered in deep, painful scratches, and sap. Damn it...
What else? It's cold as shit here. Well, not actually, since shit is usually pretty warm. I guess it depends on how long it's been sitting out. The kinda shit I'm talking about would have come out of an Eskimo's ass and left out all night on a glacier, or something...
Really fucking cold.
"Like a witches tit..."
Yeah can't you see I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel here? To top it off, I'm out of Vicodins, and I'd went through a prescription of near 200. I'm gonna miss 'em...
We don't.
"That's because he took them to get rid of us, remember?"
Alas...

Something for yer Breath...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8xrDyA3-e4
Please click on this link, people. It is a hilarious commercial a friend did for an Aquafresh commercial contest, and he needs some clicky wicky wicky scratch lovin' straight from the oven!!!
I do believe he has a winnah on his hands. I saw his competition and they were mostly all pretty lame. I wanted to do one myself, and had some great fucking ideas, but I'm still kinda ill, and lazy as all get out...
I may still do one, just for shits and giggles...
Go, Bren-Bren!!!!
Give mah nugga some love by clicking, faving, and spreading it around even more. It's a good one, and a tiny bit on ze naughty side. Not gross and/or perverted...
Just trust me here people!!! Have I ever steered you wrong yet?

Shut Yer Face!!!

Yes, yes...
Aqui estoy, for now. I dunno if I mentioned it before, but The Mist was a terrible movie. Thanks alot Stephen King, for sucking royal ass. I gave it a C-. If I gave it a better grade at any earlier time, I'm taking it back. Over time it seems to have soured even more. I'm gonna be working on some new videos soon, and a few other things, hopefully they will be interesting and totally not suck. Here's to hoping...

So many things I wanna do, nay, need to do!!! I will hopefully come out of this funk soon and be riding high again. Been listening to alot of Marty Robbins, and wow, I had no idea...

That cat had way too many things going on for one man's lifetime. Lucky guy, that Marteh...

I'm starting to feel like Crispen Glover, except without the fame and, oh yeah, money!!!

Priest Holmes: Say It Ain't So!!!

Kansas City Chiefs three-time Pro Bowl RB Priest Holmes officially announced his retirement from the National Football League on Wednesday, the day before Thanksgiving. Holmes concludes his illustrious playing career owning nine Chiefs career records and eight Chiefs single-season records. Arguably the most productive all-around offensive performer in the 48-year history of the franchise, Holmes walks away from the game as Kansas City’s all-time leader in rushing yards (6,070), rushing touchdowns (76) and total touchdowns (83). Holmes accumulated 8,172 career rushing yards in 11 seasons with Baltimore (’97-00) and Kansas City (2001-07), the highest total by any undrafted player since the AFL-NFL merger.
“I have truly been blessed with the opportunity to play in the National Football League,” Holmes commented. “I will be forever grateful to the Hunt Family and the Chiefs organization for the opportunity to come to Kansas City, where the community embraced me from day one. I have been humbled by the tremendous support that I have received from Chiefs fans over the years. I was grateful to be part of a Super Bowl team in Baltimore, but I will always fondly remember my time in Kansas City and the many great players and coaches that provided me an opportunity to be successful.”

Holmes played in 65 regular season games with 63 starts for Kansas City. He was named the NFL Offensive Player of the Year by the Associated Press after producing 1,615 rushing yards in just 14 games in 2002. Holmes became just the third Chiefs player to lead the league in rushing when he racked up 1,555 yards during his debut campaign with Kansas City in 2001. In addition to his rushing exploits, Holmes also caught 246 passes for 2,360 yards (9.6 avg.) with seven TDs. He ranks first in team history with 1,521 touches from scrimmage and is second in team annals with 24 career 100-yard rushing games. He also started a postseason contest vs. Indianapolis (1/11/04), rushing 24 times and setting Chiefs single-game postseason records with 176 yards and two TDs. He finished the day with 208 combined net yards from scrimmage, the third-highest tally in Chiefs postseason history.
Since joining the Chiefs as an unrestricted free agent in 2001, Holmes averaged a league-high 130.0 scrimmage yards per game and ranked second in the NFL by averaging 93.4 rushing yards per game. Holmes scored 83 touchdowns since 2001-05, the second-highest total in the NFL during that time span. He scored 62 rushing touchdowns from 2002-04, the second-best three-year total in NFL history. Holmes owns a host of Chiefs single-season records, including marks for points (162 in 2003), receptions by a running back (74 in 2003) and yards from scrimmage (2,287 in 2002).

I have his jersey, the only other one I shelled out moolah on was a bust in Tamarick Vanover. I was sad to see him go, they don't make many out there like him. Myself, and Kansas City fans all over are feeling the hurt once again. I thought he might be back to do some damage, I just didn't think it would be to himself...

"Priest Holmes will always be a Kansas City Chief.”

And Yet...

Before you worry and fret, always remember,

Yet never forget,

That I am here,

With you always,

I am not like you,

Yet just like you,

In many way,

I wonder, and regret,

Ponder, and preset,

My own brand of evil,

A sensuous procedure,

I mean to be,

Yet falter and fail to see,

The folly of my way...

Will there come a time? Will I have my day?

(Only time will tell...)

Tired.

A shattered heart in love's debris.
Gone and blown it all away,
How can you say, it doesn't matter much to me....
But it doesn't. How can it? I'm crying out. Save me, darling...

Post Halloween Wrap Up...

If you watch this video, you will see that not only am I a nifty kung fu kicking dancer, I'm not half bad with a little horror make up and a vividly traumatizing imagination...

"Yes, tis..."

Sho nuff!!!

I hadn't planned on doing anything more than just Cindi's Satan costume, but the other two elder children/teenagers kinda looked sad they weren't joining in on the fun. So I went to the store yet again, braving the waves of desperate last minute dawdlers, and found a few things to McGuyver together a little this and that for them...

"Boy, I'll say you did, my good man!!!"

Sho nuff!!!

Man, he's starting to sound like a broken record, ain't he? I've been kinda lazy in my half sickness and will be sure to hit the gym hard starting next week. Hopefully all this goldbricking will make me feel fantastic once I get reset all over again. I just gotta keep telling myself over and over...

"Stay away from those cigarettes, boah..."

Sho nuff!!!

So enjoy my new Halloween gift, from me to you, if ye dare...

Nothing to fear, I mean, just how scary can a video be with Fred Schneider from the B52's singing over it?

"Pretty darn scary, now that we think about it..."

Dood, don't even say it!!!

I was just going to say I agree, geez...

Tittilations and Mutilations...

A documentary tonight on A&E about Phil Spector was quite interesting. He had his fingers in alot of pie, I didn't know he was dipping into the coals there too. Ronnie Spector was pretty hot back in the day, but black chicks don't seem to age well. And he must've fucked her up pretty good, because she got all teary eyed more than a few in there. He bought her a pair of twins for Christmas, right before she jumped ship/mansion...

The adopted kids also talked about how fucked up they were due to his mistreatment and neglect. Who could imagine someone with hair like that to be a total freakazoid from planet hair halo?!?!?

Well, apparently he had a knack for bringing out the best in musicians back in the day. But as always, genius and talent come at a price, his being sanity. He did alot of boozing, and I'm sure he's the kind of guy that is pretty big into himself, since he made alot of his fortune at such an early age.

Too bad that doesn't go along very well with offing B movie has beens in the foyer of your house. Maybe the judge is a big Beatles fan, so he might get off, but I doubt it. It's amazing how money totally whacks people the fuck out. We'll see how much asspussy he's gonna hafta give out to keep all those wigs in the joint...

Which brings me to my next subject on tap for today. We saw SAW 4 at the new digital theater. That place is so fantastic, not a bad seat in the house!!! And the picture, as well as the sound. My lord, tis a dream come true. Unfortunately, the SAW series is lame as hell, and I wasted 95 minutes trying to remember why I came in the first place. It's all jumbled, and the 3rd and 4th installments are same time frame or something. Great, now I gotta remember the last piece of shit I was forced to endure...

So anyway, I'm not even going to explain it, as it made no sense to me. A genius engineer driven to building traps and scenarios to give you a crash course in self help and self mutilation...?

I ain't buying it, all because some dood opened a door on his 9 month pregnant woman's tummy, crushing his future deranged child prodigy in the process, and sending him on a collision course for Totallybatshitsville, USA with NO RETURN stamped on his forehead for all to see. We also get to see his weener, which is made even better for the simple fact that he is stone dead, so it's all chalky white. Kinda reminded me of mine after a good talcing...

I give it a D. I enjoy blood and gore, but this movie, as the others did, rubbed me the wrong way. As I've said about other turds like Scream and I Know What You Did Last Whenever the fuck it was, I want good horror, meaning monsters and things ripping people apart at the seams, not some guy orchestrating shit from beyond the grave. I've heard they are already working on 5 and 6. Please let really bad things happen to discourage them...

Please?

Hey look kids, it's 2:15 am. I wasted all my funny in chat earlier tonight. I was on a roll too, wish I had it to post here, but I probably wouldn't due to the off the wallness of it all. It would warp your fragile little minds...

The Upcoming Match Up...

So in a little over an hour we have the Chiefs versus the Raiders. I hope we tear them a new one, if you catch my drift...
"Oh that we do!!!"
Yes indeedly, deedly doo!!!
On paper, this looks to be a massacre of silver and gold. Oakland is bad about giving away huge chunks of yards to the run of late, and KC has had their number 8 times in a row now. Time to make it 9?
On top of that, Priest Holmes has been activated; my dreams of seeing him and Larry both on the field in the same game are finally coming to fruition again...
"The old one-TWO punch, baby!!!"
We will swarm upon them to feast on their battered corpses like scavengers on the fields of... uhhh.... battle?
I've been telling naysayers since the end of last season that this was going to become a reality, And it has...
"Nyah nyah nyah!!!"
We shall see in a little bit how, and whether, it all works out.

Green Power So Far...

Here's my video so far, hope you like it, or you can suck an egg instead...

30 Days of Night was fantastic, I recommend it to anyone and everyone. An instant cult classic!!! A+ material, and it was uncut to boot, or if it was, I have no idea what they could possibly put on an unrated dvd version. Even Josh Hartnett didn't suck, which is a miracle in itself.

I was just so amazed at what I saw, and everyone, including me, was speechless more than a few times. I mean not just decapitations, the whole hacking process to boot. I can't seem to stop gushing over this movie, but don't take my word for it...

Go see it, and check out my ANT foo'!!!

The No Picture Today Post!!!

Ok, here's the deal folks: This past week, everytime I pissed it was like battery acid being shoved back into my peehole. With a rusty nail...
My back in the kidney area has also steadily gotten worse as well. I've also had a fucking mind numbing headache for the past 3-4 days. Now my testicle...
It seems to be swelling to cartoonish proportions. And it's really fucking sensitive. I want to die right now, because I keep sitting on it from time to time. And it has brought playtime to a complete fucking halt. 3 days in a row.
WTF?!?!?

In Your Mouth...

So the Chiefs won in all their glory, for those of you wondering. They kinda let up on them at the end, but finished strong with a takeaway in there.

And thus I came back to my dreary world back here. Strangely of late, it's been quite silent...

"Too silent..."

Ahhhh, there you are. I was beginning to ponder your absence. And your friend?

Present.

We're all here for now. Enjoy this video preview while we try to sort out our differences, and maybe come to terms on some serious issues.

Halftime Report...

Here is a future hall of famer, reaching out for the goalposts yet again, and again, and again...
He took sole possession of Most touchdowns by a tight end and that ain't no small feat folks!!! The Chiefs are also up 20-7 at halftime right now, so I hope they don't blow it. I can't take another loss today. Herm needs to put up a win to keep his job, and to satisfy my demands of perfection. They are doing their best today...

Larry Johnson is also finally producing. He ran a long one all the way to the end zone, only to be stripped of the ball for a touchback. He looked a little disheartened by it, but he barrelled through and got his first rushing touchdown of the year, so maybe the rust has been shaken off, who knows?

I can only hope, and give my all during the game. Cincinnati looks pretty shaky, but they can burn you for long gains when you least expect it, and we seem to be having difficulties beating them in years of late. But damn, Jared Allen is tearing it up back there, Carson Palmer is gonna need a seriously long hot bath tonight to sooth those jarred bones. I've always liked Jared, and remember when he, Larry, and Tony started, and even the comings and goings of Donnie Edwards. I'm so glad he's back, he brought alot to he tables of San Diego when he dined in blue and yellow attire...

I feel a little more inspired to post of late, and plan on stepping it up a notch. We saw the Heartbreak Kid yesterday. It was a little dirty for the kids, but I give it a B. While being a Farrelly Brothers film, it still wafted heavily of his namby pambier fare of romantic pussyness. I wanted more off the wall, and way out there. Instead I get close ups of some psycho chick's retro bush. The chick he leaves her for is a hottie, but I would've kept the latina at the end. I love that accent, it sends shivers up and down my spine...

I need some Braum's...

If only!!!

Hogwash!!!

So I saw The Dark is Rising: The Seeker last night, it was pretty good, especially for a PG rated film. The special effects were quite nice, showing that you don't have to resort to some serious bloodletting to get your point across. Or have to break out gratuitous amounts of T&A, ala Hostel and any other of those shitty newfangled horror movie turds out there...
I give it a strong A-, I thought it had alot of heart. I read the books when I was a kid, but they modernized it quite a bit, but it wasn't too distracting...
Hope there's more to come!!!

I guess in a bit I'm going to see the new Ben Stiller movie, so I hope it doesn't suck. Better not.
I just got out of the shower, because I got a little cruddy replacing the toilet in my front bathroom. So gross!!! And that shit is completely hard as heck to put in, you need freakin' tiny spider monkey hands to get to all those nuts and bolts you need to connect. And of course, you always have to buy other things as the old connectors no longer fit. It's a bunch of Hogwash!!!
More to come...

Didja Get Any Onya...?

The song being Obsession, the mayon is da Graveh. Strange that I post this after I cut all my hair off. These things happen...

Premeditated to be Medicated...

Boy now howdeh folks. I am here, and you are my captive audience. You are riveted to the spot, awaiting my divine wisdom in all its wisdomy gooeyness. But sadly, the well is dry for now, nothing witty to spooge on ya...
"The boy's a bit daft of lates..."
Boy now howdeh?

Soul pirates drifting in a sea of bliss,
Soul pirates...
Get your headgear around this!!!
Herb is once again in plenty, and fundage abounds. I've seen alot of new movies but have been too lazy to post them. Good Luck Chuck was good, I give it a B+ due to major wood from Jessica Alba. Mr. Woodcock I give maybe a C+, I just wasn't into it. Dragon Wars was lame, I wasn't into that crap at all. But I saw Resident Evil 3 twice now already, it was the cream of the crop. A+ all the way. I didn't much care for the Alice storyline but damn those zombies were foin!!!
So what else: Bought kid an XBOX 360 or whatever, and the Halo 3 game blows, but the guitar game is kinda fun.
All I've been listening to lately is Persuasion by Adam Ant, his great unreleased album. This was to be his return to the throne methinks, I'm still oddly pissed about it. Too bad record companies still had alot of pull back then, glad the net is taking some of that control back out of their greedy little paws. This album is like brain candy baby. Too bad most will never know it...
I'm bored, I need something to do. A hobbeh. I was working on my serial killer mentality by spiraling ever downwards. I can't seem to let go at the very end though, it's kinda like not putting out your arms as you are falling to stop the fall, most of the time it can't be done. And you damn sure ain't gonna able to keep from wincing, because that shit can twist up your neck something fierce. I've actually perfected this ability to let go and fall without moving in any way to cushion the fall. But then again, I know, and can accept, the pain it will surely blanket me with, and the lingering ache in my neck to remind me of the folly of this bizarre and meaningless experiment.
"Or the time you launched yourself at that tree with only a bump hat to protect you, and got about ten feet or so of air before you turned your neck on that tree trunk and ended up pinching a nerve. You could barely move for a couple days after..."
Dumbass.
It seemed like a good idea at the time, and I'm still planning on getting tasered on camera soon. Physical pain doesn't bother me one bit, it's those mental barriers I have trouble with. And I don't mean going in. I mean coming back out. Once I give in, it's all over but the poking and the prodding. The why. And what caused such a tragedy.
I can see it now. He had problems way back, they would say. But he had gotten over them, and seemed an extremely normal person now. But there was always something about him, like desperation behind his words even more than in his eyes. He was like a saint, and a courteous fellow. But you always felt the touch of the damned, an abomination in hibernation...
I fit all the criteria. Numerous head injuries, and a profile of deviant behavior had anyone bothered to notice.
"Genius or madman?"
A bit of both.
Reality was never something I flourished in anyway. Daydreams of vengeful justice, delivered in most bloodcurdling detail. Multitudes of loving worshippers, knowing I'm about to blow their minds with a few tidbits of whatever happens to be floating around in my melon. Life as a music video, one long continuous dedication to the best of the 80's. An ever flowing funkfest, and I sparkle. I shine. I glow, and my brilliance can't be denied. It even slams into the eyelids with force enough to render most weak and unable to turn away. I am those times when you felt safe, yet they are faded. The future holds nothing but bleak despair. That is reality. Little pockets of cream filled goodness, surrounded by a stale, moldy, hardened crust of a once golden brown snacky cake. And it's ten times as thick. You'll get no milk to wash it down with either. It's sink or swim time, and everytime you take a bite, it seems like it expands to fill in the void as fast as you chomp down upon it. You have to have gotten to the middle before, you can almost still remember the taste and elation. Or did you ever really reach the middle?
"Content to nibble at the edges, he seems..."
Rascal...