Well, here we go again...
"Another birthday started off with a bang eh?"Does it ever not?My wife wants to throw me a party, yeah right. The only problem is I don't like any of the motherfuckers she wants to invite, her cousins and family that do nothing but drink and act like fucking fools. This is a party for her and her asshole friends and family, not me.
The thing is, I was kinda hoping to not spend the rest of my weekend in jail for beating the shit out of someone, anyone, who gets on my nerves, or in my way.
Or fucking tries to hug me, tell me they love me, and expect me to relate to their drunken shenanigans...
She's not here right now, and we just got done arguing earlier over the whole thing. So she ain't answering the phone either, and was trying to threaten me with leaving me.
Big fucking deal.I'm a little bit tired of the whole "trying to relive the past/ fighting off the aging process" thing anyway. I told her to feel free to get the fuck out whenever she feels like it. She wants to sit around with her extended family and get all stoopid and weepy over anything and everything. And I'm sure some of them will be inebriated enough to get into a scuffle or two. They always do...
I'm just not interested in seeing people from my unhappy drinking days, or reliving them, or watching her relive them.
I work out and eat right for a reason: I'm trying to have a healthy inside and outside. She doesn't wanna do this. She wants to continue to spiral downwards into obesity, insanity, and idiocy. I know I sound harsh in my critique, but geez people, I'm tired of this, and I do so believe my kids are too. Besides, this marriage has been dead for years. I shoulda buried that shit a long time ago.
"When is enough enough?"Now, possibly...
It's time I finally had my cake and be able to eat it too. I haven't been happy in too long, and have neglected myself forever. It's high time I gave myself the ultimate birthday present.
FREEEEEEEDOMMMMMMMM!!!!!!
Now imagine me yelling that to the world, Braveheart style. This is how I feel constantly. So my birthday is just swell right now, but I did just get done cooking breakfast for the kids, sans wife. I guess this shouldn't/wouldn't be much of a jump in situation to be alone, I would just like to make sure I get custody of my daughter, since she would probably be spending all her time drunk on the weekends and at the casino during the week like she does now. I would also take the two stepchildren whenever they wanted to come, as I raised one since he was 3 and is now 15. It isn't fair for them, but I do believe change is in order.
Now do you understand why I haven't been posting up much? I feel nothing but hate, and am bitter at life for constantly taking my cake and grinding it into my face. There are things that I am happy about, so don't despair for me folk, and things will eventually be looking up soon methinks. I will just have to get my finances in order, and hope she doesn't try to take me to the cleaners later. I want my daughter for all the right reasons, she will want her for monetary gains. I don't want her to not see her or anything, but I'm not letting her have custody later so she can leave my kid with someone else while she runs off to the casino and shit like that, like her sister does.
Why don't people come with a psychic evaluation before they can enter the dating environment? I feel like I've wasted 12 years tomorrow, when I coulda been doing something so much more worthwhile. I wouldn't trade my kid for anything in the world though, and would gladly endure it all again, as I love her with everything I've got. I just wish I didn't have to possibly have to change her life drastically just as school is starting. I will get through this, and will come out on top in the end, I promise you this.
"Who the hell says you're worth your weight in gold, when gold is..."
Good enough for me!!!
I'll be having my cake Monday and Tuesday, if all goes right. I will go into greater detail when I get back, but will divulge this much to ye now. The Bodies Exhibit is in Branson, and I wanna see it. I will also probably take my father out for breakfast, and possibly surprise my mom by going to her work and taking her out to lunch. I've neglected the things that are important to me long enough. It's time I started showing the people that I care about that I love them too. Now is when it starts. From now on I plan on knocking 'em outta the park!!!
BATTER UP!!!
Amazing what you can McGuyver at 12:30 am when it's getting near time to do some serious shopping, meaning the fridge was near bare. I also threw some hash browns in the oven next to it, with a dollop of oil on it to crispify it further. Sadly, fish stick sammich is no longer with us.
Yet he knew too much, he'd seen things he shouldn't have seen. I'd spied him hanging out at the back of the freezer with the tater tots. And we damn well know they can't be trusted!!!
